Elmer McNulty

by Bob Zeidman

Elmer McNulty grows up poor on a farm in Kansas, wants to be a singer. He is discovered by a promoter on his way from New York to Hollywood. He is taken from his parents to Hollywood where he becomes famous and attends grown-up parties and buys a big house with lots of toys. As he gets older he forms a company, promotes other singers and himself, tours the world, becomes hugely rich, works hard. His parents pass away but he never had much time for them anyway. As he gets much older he begins regretting that he never had a childhood. He invests all his money with some scientists to discover something to make him a child again. They can't do it, so he fires them and works on it by himself. He invests all his money, moves to smaller and smaller buildings, becomes poor. In one building, little kids play in an empty lot next door. They are noisy and he goes out to yell at them. They leave except one little girl who apologizes and invites him to play jacks. The kids return and they all play. Elmer sells off his equipment and uses the money to pave the lot and set up a simple playground. He spends every day for the rest of his life in the playground with the kids.